Monday Memo

It's so hot in Indiana...
...the birds have to use potholders to pull the worms out of the ground.
...the trees are whistling for the dogs.
...the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
...hot water comes from both taps.
...you can make sun tea instantly.
...you learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron.
...the temperature drops below 90 F and you feel a little chilly.
...you discover that in July it only takes two fingers to steer your car.
...you discover that you can get sunburned through your car windo.
...you actually burn your hand opening the car door. 
...you break a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m.
...you realize that asphalt has a liquid state.
...the potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out a
add butter.
...the cows are giving evaporated milk.
...farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from 
laying boiled eggs.
The author of this piece is unknown but he/she sure knows Indiana in the summertime. Stay cool!